In my own words, a "Realistic Dreamer" is someone who is content with her surroundings and situations while waiting in expectation for what's around the corner. She is learning to be thankful for every season while not settling for the monotony of a regimented schedule or routine. She has high expectations of herself while understanding (and wrestling with) the Lord's timing in all things.
Yes, my friends, I am a Realistic Dreamer.
There are some serious downsides to this.
F. Scott Fitzgerald puts it well.
“It was always the becoming he dreamed of, never the being.”
Oftentimes, it's hard to stay still long enough to reflect on the past and present. I tend to meditate on what God has for us on the horizon rather than savor God's faithfulness today and in my 25 years on earth. Always reaching, waiting and hoping for the next new adventure, I struggle with peace and contentment in all things. If I'm not in His word, I can get disappointed quickly. I can hear Satan say, "How does you life measure up with your friends? You're not starting a family...you don't even have a home...you had to start your career ALL over, poor you..."
Shut up, Satan.
Needless to say, this is an area of my life I'm constantly learning to lay at His feet.
SEGUE ----
My dearest best friend whom I look up to and admire shines in this. She is always at peace with where God has her. She doesn't compare herself to others and is full of JOY always. I thank the Lord for placing her in my life as a steady example of a godly woman who exemplifies peace and absolute trust in Her father.
Where was I? Oh yes...
Did I always envision myself living on a seminary college campus and unsure of my husband's exact career future at 25 years old? Definitely not. Did I know God would place me with a man who didn't quite have his "career ducks in a row" and a serious cash flow (isn't that hilarious?)? Nope. Did I assume I'd be starting a family right about now and planning for that next chapter? You betcha.
But God, in His sovereignty, knows exactly what my life needs to look like in order for Him to be at the very center.
He is the one who gives me ultimate satisfaction and peace, not man. He is my provider and solid rock. He is the Giver of Life, not a Giver-of-what-my-petty-heart-wants-today God because, frankly, I am an utter mess when it comes to the "What I Want" department (Burberry scarf, anyone?). My wants tend to shift and change depending on the seasons!
He is a faithful God who has provided a loving, godly husband who pursues our Father with every fiber. Jimmy is seeking after where God is leading Him, and I am honored to run the race with him. God has also placed incredible family and friends in our midst who support, uplift and encourage us. We are totally and completely blessed.
So, is being a Realistic Dreamer a bad thing? No, it's part of who I am in Christ! Yet, there are movements in my heart that can push and prod me out of contentment in Him that I must always be aware of. Satan can be more powerful than I sometimes think, yet praise Him that we have a God who is our Rock, Refuge, Shield, Salvation, Stronghold, Savior.
My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield, and the horn of my salvation,
my stronghold and my refuge, my savior;
you save me from violence.
I call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised,
and I am saved from my enemies.
- 2 Samuel 22:3-4 -
In Him,
Emily
No comments:
Post a Comment